Some New York Times Articles

(via) Collaborative Divorce Professionals Group

I thought I'd pass along some interesting New York Times articles people have posted in LinkedIn's Collaborative Divorce Professionals Group

"Postpartum Depression Strikes Fathers, Too" is about a first-time father who become "anxious, sad and withdrawn" after the birth of his child.

The pregnancy was easy, the delivery a breeze. This was the couple’s first baby, and they were thrilled. But within two months, the bliss of new parenthood was shattered by postpartum depression.

A sad, familiar story. But this one had a twist: The patient who came to me for treatment was not the mother but her husband.

A few weeks after the baby arrived, he had become uncharacteristically anxious, sad and withdrawn. He had trouble sleeping, even though his wife was the one up at night breast-feeding their new son. What scared her enough to bring him to my office was that he had become suicidal. Continue reading»

Someone also posted this NYT report about the increasing rate of divorces in the military.

The divorce rate in the armed forces rose again in the past year, the Pentagon said, and is now is a full percentage point higher than around the time of the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001.

There were an estimated 27,312 divorces among roughly 765,000 married members of the active-duty Army, Air Force, Navy and Marine Corps in the budget year that ended Sept. 30. That is a divorce rate of about 3.6 percent for the fiscal year 2009, compared with 3.4 percent a year earlier, according to figures from the Defense Manpower Data Center. In late 2001 the reported rate was 2.6 percent.

As in previous years, women in uniform had much higher divorce rates than their male counterparts — 7.7 percent in 2009, compared with 3 percent for men. There is no comparable annual system for tracking the civilian divorce rate, though the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said in 2005 that 43 percent of all first marriages ended in divorce within 10 years. Continue reading "Divorces Rising in Military"»

Some New York Times Articles

Rate-a-Neutral

I've posted a few blogs on the benefits of divorce mediation (see: Divorce Mediation), but I recently saw an article in the ABA Journal about a new nonprofit company that will start rating arbitrators and mediators.

International Institute for Conflict Prevention and Resolution is the first of its kind to "connect practitioners to the best practices in dispute resolution," and will begin providing online ratings early next year. Here's an excert from the ABA's article, Rate-a-Neutral: Group to Offer Evaluations of Arbitrators, Mediators:

With Fortune 500 companies demanding more transparency in the dispute resolution process, a New York City-based nonprofit has decided to start rating arbitrators and mediators.

The International Institute for Conflict Prevention & Resolution hopes its online ratings will be available early next year. Its members will be able to use their passwords to access the information on the organization’s website.

The service is believed to be the first of its kind for alternative dispute resolution. It was developed after institute members—largely Fortune 500 companies and their lawyers—complained there wasn’t enough information available on mediators and arbitrators, called neutrals, according to Kathleen Bryan, the organization’s president and chief executive officer. Continue reading»

Rate-a-Neutral

Paternity Fraud

I came across Sam Hasler's Indiana Divorce & Family Law Blog and found an interesting post about the problems concerning paternity suits. Hasler has some interesting information about this "very large problem" that isn't talked about too often.

He also includes some good articles from the New York Times and Men's News Daily. Check out "More on Paternity Fraud" and let me know what you think about the issue!

Paternity Fraud

Saturday Night Blues

Here is a good article from The Globe Magazine. "Saturday Night Blues" is about a 50-something year old divorcee, who is adjusting to being "suddenly single." Here's an excert:

But when I found myself suddenly single in my 50s, Saturday night was a black hole that seemed to epitomize everything that was hard about my new life. It highlighted all that was missing on that special night of the weekend when I was now a floater at dinner parties. Activities that felt great during the day -- like going to the gym -- felt sad on a Saturday night. (Why is the sight of an empty locker room so depressing on date night?) I knew full well what my couple friends were up to most of their Saturday nights, and it wasn’t all that electrifying: They were home watching sports on TV, Skype-ing their kids, figuring out their latest iPhone apps. Still, that was little consolation, and I was certain they were having more fun than I was, because they were two, not one.

I’d sink by sundown on Saturday if I found myself with no plans. I’d overcompensate for several Saturday nights to come so that would never happen again -- frantically filling up my calendar with dinners and dates, even overbooking sometimes, so I wouldn’t have to spend a Saturday night alone. I’d go out with men who were all wrong for me, like the one who told me over coffee that he was born again or the one who boasted first thing over appetizers that he’d been married three times. It was Saturday night -- the black hole -- and I had to fill it. Continue reading »

Saturday Night Blues

Using a Collaborative Approach

There is an interesting discussion going on in LinkedIn's Collaborative Family Law Group about using a collaborative approach with clients. The question is, "How do we help clients decide if the Collaborative approach is the best for them?" The inquring lawyer works in England, where the approach has become a new alternative, and is writing a guide about it for clients.

How do we help clients decide if the Collaborative approach is the best for them?

Where I work in England the Collaborative approach is still relatively new. Most lawyers offer this as one option from a basket of dispute resolution processes. How do we help clients genuinely make the choice to work collaboratively? I am writing a guide for clients on this topic and would be interested to hear what people think clients really need to know (in practical terms) and understand before they decide if the Collaborative approach is the best for them. Continue reading » 

Don't forget to leave your own comments here »

Using a Collaborative Approach

Parental Alienation & Divorce Mediation Webcast

Here is a recent online radio discussion on parental alienation and divorce. Give it a listen and tell me what you think. Listen here »

Parental Alienation & Divorce Mediation Webcast

Divorce Myths

When talking about divorce, people might mention everything from horror stories, to the latest celebrity divorces, or even your own experiences. But reality is often very different, with each divorce having its own unique set of circumstances.

To read some of the facts and myths about divorce, check out Divorce Myths.

You can also post your comments about divorce myths in the LinkedIn's Collaborative Family Law Group

Divorce Myths